Excited to take control? Here is how to organize your first BDSM and erotic play session, as a Mistress
In ordinary life, a woman is expected to be delicate, feminine and...submissive. But what happens when you want to try to dominate in the bedroom? And not only that, but also to tie up your partner and show him who is in charge?
You have this daydream, to be A Dominator, but to put it into practice… how do you do it? For those who want to experience domination, the fear of failure can prevent from taking the first step.
Here are some examples of BDSM scenes easy to follow, which will stimulate your fantasy and initiative, help you relax to overcome the emotions of the beginning. Once you have tried these scenes and started to feel more in control of yourself as a Dominatrix, you can imagine other scenes, derived from these ones, or totally different. It is all based on your confidence as a Dominant woman, confidence that you will gradually acquire, experimenting and putting into practice the sexy ideas and fantasies of taking control which are going through your mind now!
Scenes of female domination: rules
First of all, many of the scenes involve restricting your partner's eyesight: it is much easier to trust and feel comfortable doing new things when you are not under your partner's gaze. But, sight-restriction is a BDSM procedure that you can use for two purposes.
The scenes described below can also be applied among other types of partners, between lesbians, for example. You can enjoy these scenes of taking control adapted to the type of relationship that suits you.
Before any game scenario, you need to discuss with your partner the fact that you want to take control: to tie and restrict someone's eye-sight, you cannot do without discussing and obtaining consent, otherwise the scene might end before it is started, with the person's refusal.
It is good to talk to your partner some time in advance, ask for his consent, set a safeword or a gesture of safety.
You will see, however, that in this position of domination, you will need scenarios to get your own pleasure. But you will be able to adapt the scenario so that you can get your physical pleasure. It is not submissive to "force" your partner to give you physical pleasure! However, when you focus for the first time on a scene of domination, it may be hard to concentrate to stay in the receiving position: it is easier to get into the mental state of dominance if you take actions than when receiving them.
With these in mind, here are some scenes to help you practice your domineering skills:
Domination by sensual touch only
Tell him you are taking control of him for a while. Tell him you will be at his disposal after, if he accepts your game first. But if he wouldn't comply, you are going to have to postpone the BDSM game for another night... Once he agrees to obey you, you make him lie down in bed, either on his back or on his face, as you wish. Then you take a scarf, blindfold him and tell he is not allowed to move without permission. Choose one or two parts of the body that he is not allowed to move, for example, your arms; if you want it to be more intense, prepare two ties next to the parts he might move, and if it happens... you will restrict him further. Once immobilized, you will go from producing sensual pleasure in what way you will: you can choose to walk a fine feather along his body, or follow sensitive areas with your fingers and nails... You can massage him with oil, or tickle him until you get to the genital area, continuing with oral sex... You can, this time, spank him with a paddle or flogger over the parts he may have moved, or you can slap him on those parts that have been "naughty"... But, as when you used to be the subject of the impact play, you need to get your partner's consent for any impact procedure.
To move from the session of domination to the session of obedience, as you promised, sit next to him and tell him how much you liked it, how intensely you were excited about the session of domination that you wish being repeated from time to time, when you promise to do more… Praise him for the way he behaved, kiss him and caress him, moving slowly to the next stage of your session.
His orgasm in your control
As in the scene before, you start by blindfolding your partner. Then you slowly strip him, each item of clothing separately, commenting slightly ironically what you reveal to your vision... (for example, squares would look better defined with more hours at the gym, by bike, or swimming... or jeans would look perfect if they weren't drilled...). Once having him naked, you lead your partner to the place of action, bed, armchair, chair... you put him on it, or you sit down: you push him gently and you turn him to the desired position, making a joke about the need to be led to bed...
Once your partner is in the desired position, it is time to show him your control! As you wish: you can give him the greatest oral sex of his life! You could bring him to orgasm in two minutes if you wanted to, but this time, a slow, exciting, session... You draw your fingers with your fingernails on his skin, everywhere, except where he wants... blow cold air where he is hotter... gently, repeatedly, on the most sensitive areas, keeping him excited to the extreme, but without gratification!
You can keep him very close to the climax, without letting him touching you, either using your knowledge of his closeness to orgasm, or asking him directly to tell you when he is close to orgasm, under the threat that otherwise you won't allow him to touch you later. Use your hands and mouth to bring him close to orgasm; then retire in time, just before his climax... Repeat the procedure several times; torture him this way, until you decide it is time to allow him to orgasm!
It is your scene, the ending belongs to you as you are in control: you can postpone the orgasm until the next day... or, continue with sex, if you wish; enjoy your dominance by facesitting, allowing him to have climax only after you have your own!
He is now your sex toy
Many fantasies have as main subject the objectification, namely to be used as an object intended to pleasure the Dominatrix. Here is the scenario of strongest dominance: it should take place when you are aroused and need to play BDSM and sexually with your partner. Choose a time when your partner is not yet aroused, but suitable for a game session, not after a tiring day at work...
Once the moment well chosen, you are going to show him that you are in control: getting touchier or pushing yourself against him and maybe, telling him directly that you want to use his body for your own pleasure. Whatever you choose being in control, as long as you are reasonable in your requirements, your partner will be willing to fulfill your demands and fantasy of domination, to common pleasure!
How to be the sex session and dominance is your choice this time. For a stronger feeling of domination, the position of sex “the woman on top” is to be approached, with your partner seated or lying on the bed, the latter position further differentiating the possession of control. Once you have decided what position you are going to be in, don't forget to restrict your partner's vision and movements, tie his eyes with a scarf, cuff him and undress him exactly as much as you need to clear just the areas you want to have access to. Don't forget it is your erotic toy now!
Choose the type of sex you want for this session: if you prefer a vibrator, have your partner driving it onto your clitoris while you feel the pleasure riding him! Do you want sex? Enjoy it fully! Do you want other pleasures? Uncuff him and have him play with your clitoris... If you both like anal sex with a dildo or vibrator for your partner, now is the best time for that. If you want, you can remove the scarf from his eyes: let him watch your orgasm, just looking at you, no touching... As he is your sex toy, you can ban his orgasm, or, if you like him orgasming, let him finish, enjoying it together.
As long as you have your partner's consent, you can choose and master your dominance the way you like it best. Make the most of your BDSM play session as A Dominant!